BOAT JOKES (we need a few laughs)

Discussion in 'All Things Boats & Boating' started by brian eiland, Oct 29, 2006.

  1. Angélique
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    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)


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    ‘‘ Hell's Kitchen – B-17F 41-24392 one of only three early B-17F's in the 414th Bomb Squadron to complete more than 100 combat missions. ’’
     
  2. hoytedow
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    hoytedow Wood Butcher

  3. Angélique
    Joined: Feb 2009
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

    Thanks Hoyt, due to the 1:53:45 I'll have to save watching it till around Xmas, but it looks great enough to do so . . :) - (spare link French subtitled)

    It says it was released in the U.S. as Spitfire, with Leslie Howard as producer and director, and in the role of R. J. Mitchell....
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    Since this is the boat jokes thread, a U-boat crew fished up from a rubber dinghy comes in . . . .




    (spare link, and one with Dutch subtitles)
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2018
  4. Angélique
    Joined: Feb 2009
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

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    At some recent boatdesign.net funnel talk the above car came up, so I've looked if there were other options . . .

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    big rig exhausts

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    real funnel exhaust

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    organ exhaust

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    big horn exhaust

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    turbine exhausts

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    spaghetti exhausts

    Hey this is no joke, the first link is mostly about boats !
     
    Last edited: Dec 17, 2018
  5. Angélique
    Joined: Feb 2009
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

  6. SamSam
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    Location: Coastal Georgia

    SamSam Senior Member

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  7. Angélique
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

    At first I thought that was a made up piece, but then it turned out to be for real, the article is about Blair Robertson and Eddie Diijon, both claim to be psychic about anything but their personal life, so they can be trusted by anyone but themselves, now that's hilarious . . . :D


    Note, not in Arizona, the ABC15 Arizona news channel picked up that piece about Blair Robertson who is from Arizona, the incident itself occurred in Niagara-on-the-Lake, Ontario, Canada (US border), on June 2th 2017...

    June 2, 2017 - Niagara-on-the-Lake, Ont. Canada, at Silk’s Country Kitchen - the Toronto Sun
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2018
  8. Angélique
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

    Well, there ain't much like reality, those two psychics were sitting right in front of the sign ‘‘Drive Thru Window’’, so who on earth couldn't have seen that coming . . . :D

    Google Street View of the spot where it all happened . . :cool:
    - zoom in to the left and you see the sign ‘‘Drive Thru Window’’
    - zoom in to right and you see the venue ‘‘Silk's Country Kitchen’’
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2018
  9. SamSam
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    Location: Coastal Georgia

    SamSam Senior Member

  10. Angélique
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

    The prejudices are certainly food for thought.

    Besides that, I've been forced to go to church throughout my childhood, and never I've heard a Minister ask ‘‘can you hear me in the back’’ that's no joke.
     
    Last edited: Jan 1, 2019
  11. Rurudyne
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    Rurudyne Senior Member

    A man walked into a crowded bar and yelled out: "This is my 1911 Colt 45 with one in the chamber and seven ready to go! I want to know which of you low lifes has been sleeping with my wife!"

    From the back of the bar a waitress shouted: "Put that thing away, George, you're gonna need lots more ammo than that!"
     
  12. Rurudyne
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    Rurudyne Senior Member

    On a long flight Richard Dawkins found himself sitting next to an old cowboy reading the Bible.

    “You know,” he said, “conversations help flights go faster.”

    “That sounds like a good idea.” the cowboy said as he set the book down, “What do you have in mind?”

    “Well. We could talk about evolution and how it demonstrates there’s no need for God.” Dawkins said smugly.

    Without missing a beat the cowboy said: “Sure. But first, Mr Dawkins, could you answer something for me? You see, cows, horses and deer all eat the same sort of stuff but what comes out is very different. Cows make pads, horses clumps and deer pellets. So what is the evolutionary benefit for each style of poop?”

    Dawkins was a bit astonished that the man had recognized him and a bit put off by an actual nuanced question so he thought for a moment before admitting he didn’t really know what the advantages were.

    “So what you’re telling me is, you can talk about God but can’t explain crap?”

    And with that the cowboy went back to reading.
     
  13. Angélique
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    Location: Belgium ⇄ The Netherlands

    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

    Never spoil a good joke with facts, but the answer is pretty simple (Dutch link) - (Google auto translate) - :)
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2019
  14. Rurudyne
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    Rurudyne Senior Member

    A fella had moved to Texas from Wyoming and after he and his family had settled in he found himself a local bar visited by people he thought he’d like well enough to hang out with.

    For his very first order he had three draft beers but to the bartender’s surprise he sat there taking a sip from each in rotation till all was gone. Then he ordered a second trio.

    “Sir,” the bartender spoke hesitantly, “when I pour these they start to go flat. If you ordered just one at a time they’d taste better.”

    The man waved his hand dismissively: “I have two brothers, one on Arizona and the other now in Colorado. We used to drink together all the time back home and when we started moving away we started drinking like this so we’re still drinking together even though apart.”

    “You’re drinking your brothers’ beer?”

    “You got it! And they drink mine the same.”

    For several years the man was a regular, always with his three mugs at a time, but one day he came in and only ordered two.

    There was dead silence in the bar and finally the bartender found his voice and offered the man condolences for his loss. Others followed suit.

    The man just stood there for a moment but suddenly laughed.

    “Oh, no, we’re all fine! Me and the missus just joined a Baptist congregation and I’ve had to give up beer.”

    He took a sip from each.

    “Doesn’t affect my brothers though…”
     

  15. Rurudyne
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    Rurudyne Senior Member

    There's a punny observation to be made ... I'll let someone else make it.

     
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