Letting it out......

Well, this post is just to let some steam out. All I want to do is design and manufacture my own line of boats but I am being driven in two different directions. Stay at my Dad's business for the rest of my working career which I have no interest in and can't stand my Dad as my boss, but I would be pretty well off financially. Or work for him another two years(give or take) and take a risk and start my own business in the boating industry. All I can think about is building boats as my company. I come to work, do the work, but 90% of the time I am trying to figure out what is the fastest way to start up a company building boats. Going to school for design, loans, etc. I think about this when I am driving to and from work. I research different boats- should I use a dealer network or build to order from the warehouse. I have this huge dream, but feel stuck. Dont know where to begin. I have so many ideas. The thing that drives me crazy is taking that risk of starting a company in the marine industry. I started the Westlawn course and then I grew anxiety. I kept second guessing myself instead of growing some marbles and taking the risk. I sent the program back. Talked to Dave Gerr a few weeks back for some insight on what courses I need to take because I dont exactly want to build yachts. He helped out. I tried applying to some local bat manufacturers, but no dice. Maybe I should take the classes and learn by doing. I just want to try it before its too late, before I settle down and have a family, etc. My Dad keeps trying to persuade me in staying with his company. I say sure and then the next day I am ready to walk out. Most of the people I talk to tell me all the negatives about going for it. Only one person gives me some positive feed back. I wish I could find someone to sit down with and be like "Scott, this is what you need to do first,etc." Is it this hard? I rather give it a shot and burn, then not try at all. What to do, what to do. If you read this....I really dont know what to tell you but thanks.

 

Hey Scott, just remember one thing, you only get one chance, better to say I tried and fuc*ed up, than always wonder what it would have been like!! By the sound of it go do it, if you go wrong the old man Will take you back on (he'll enjoy crowing about it for the rest of his life but he WILL be PROUD that his boy did at least stand up for himself - he won't bloody well tell you that of course!!)

We all have to make our own decissions but one thing I've always insisted on since I left school (at 15) was that if the job dropped below 60% enjoyable I moved to another - sure I've had some bad times, made some absolute howlers but hell it's been fun! Go for it! and the best of luck (you'll make your own but anyway!!)

 

Definately go for it on your own.

If it fails, it fails, but even if it just floats it will give you the satisfaction of being "independant". That is definately worth the loss in income.

 

Most people I've talked to left me with the impression that they just burnt out all other options and were to bullheaded to admit defeat, so they went out on their own.

Sometimes people start their own business because no one will hire them or they just lost their job....................deciding to go from project to project instead of employer to employer.

You will never know everthing - gotta get over that one. Knowing when to get help with what you can't do yourself is important.

Still single?

There ya go, marry a rich woman.............problem solved.

 

I currently do have a job. The reason I want to do it on my own isnt because I havent been hired by another employer. I would like to be hired to get experience, learn how the business works then venture off on my own. Also, having my own company excites me. Its a challenge.

 

Het Scott, I know what you are going through, I had a similar situation with my own Father, very difficult when he is the boss, especially if he is the ruthless type as mine was. Since I left our family business (house building) I have never got on better with him and we now have a great relationship.
That in itself is a good reason to strike out on your own and I am sure once you get some momentum going he will actually help you and eventually when your worth a couple or three million he will say it was all his idea in the first place. If you do fail, God forbid, I am sure he will have you back anyway after all you are his flesh and blood.
I think you have your head screwed on the right way and I think your idea of working for someone else to learn the business (and making someone elses mistakes with their money) is a fabulous idea. Do anything for them and everything so you know all the trades, even the mundane lowest jobs, and do everything as best as you possibly can with a smile on your face.
Go for it................
Alternatively I like Kach's idea - marry a rich woman..............

 

This is the thing that will put a wrench in the gears. You say it like it's a natural routine, "I gotta take a dump,etc,I'll be right back." You don't 'have' to settle down, and especially, you don't 'have' to 'have' a family. The survival of the species is assured, you adding to it won't help, in fact it might hurt. 'Having' a family will be your lifes biggest expense and your main priority/responsibility, what you 'want' to do will take a backseat to what you 'have' to do. Sam

 

family is #1 and your dreams are important too, start you buisiness on the side , ask for your fathers help ,involve him,I dont like to air my business but I like the guys on this site so here goes; in 1967 my father went to nam, before this, he would take me and my brother fishin ,kite flying and everything ;after that,all we done was yard work,he retired from the military and bought a farm, you guessed it ;farm work he never talked to us exept to tell me and my brother what type of work to do,,,,,,,I really missed those years,I am now 46 yrs old .the relationship I have now is much better, he has an interest in the sailboat. also had I listened to him early on I would be better off. dont exclude your father, ,,,be strait up with him,( he will respect you more for being a man) tell him your feelings and dreams,you may be surprised.,,,,,,,,,dont worry about trying before its to late, you sound like a young man to me, ,,,,,all we have is time ,best of luck ,,longliner

 

Its easier to expand yur dad's business than opening new venue. I am 35 single set up a underbone bike shop trainned at Yamaha HongKong in return burn all my quids in sponsor............... set up the craziest club in Kalimantan almost 24hour nonstop party did dat for 5 years and went broke.......... what u earned is just experience............... Now help my dad and got hook to boat......

What i mean is if you are single and your dad sort of able to bail u out , then u should try it for experience and knowledge ............ get hook to brilliant ancient people in the boat design forum is a way.......... I too improve in my workmanship because of the thread they wrote broaden my mind..............

Get to filrt with rich widow for no obligation is better than with hand on experience crash with the best lady on the block would be the best option....... have sex without spending then have sex with responsiblitiy.......Wear condoms or wrap around.......plastic

 

Letting it out....

There's some sound advice here Scottg. It's the 'rites of passage' thing. Few dad's can consider their sons moving in any direction except their own.
My old dad inherited his dad's trawler - even though his heart was in flying - (an ambition he achieved briefly in World War II as pilot of a Sunderland flying boat escorting the Russia-bound convoys out of Scotland. As an aside, whilst flying patrol he also plotted a whole new series of fishing grounds...)
Me, and my two brothers naturally growing up as school holiday deckhands were expected to follow in his wake. We all did. I personally loved the life. The younger brother broke free and now teaches city gents the art of fly-fishing, and young offenders the art of rockclimbing in the Scottish Highlands; the older brother broke free and became one of the world's leading authorities on 'fuschias' - even designing a commemorative fuschia for HM Liz's fifty years on the throne (and him a rabid Socialist..pah).
I did 25 years at sea, got fed-up with wet underwear and soggy bedding, and came 'ashore' to work on oil-rigs; became editor of a local newspaper; emigrated; became the late Kerry Packer's gardener; drove a steam engine; became a university lecturer; raised goats; dashed off a couple of books; and now devote my time to petrifying my teenage daughters' prospective boyfriends, and being a pain in the arse to the local Town Council.
In short, Scottg - life is truly great. Get into it and use it to its full. As friend Walrus hints - this one isn't a rehearsal - it's the REAL thing.
Walk your own path. If you stumble - get up and carry on.

 

Hindsight is a great thing!

Looking back, I would advise differently!

I learned most of what helped me to do what I wanted later in life - from doing what I hated, earier in life!.

I left school @ 18, and at 19 went bush to get away from my Alcoholic old man - and be my own man, which I largely did for 10 years!

I worked for the railways which I hated for 10 years and Married my childhood sweetheart (who's biggest achievement after our 3 great kids, and 27 years of marriage was to become another mans ***** - but thats a different story).

So - after 10 years being my own man, my ol man FINALLY gets sober - only to find he's lost 'everything'. His Business (he was a successful master builder for a lot of years before the booze got him!). His House, His Freinds, and His Wife (my mother) who thanks be to god - realised that because he was STILL an adulterer after he got sober - there was no hope for her future with him and divorced him (with our kids endorsement of her decision).

Everyones abandoned my ol man including me..

But he's sober and turned his life around - spending inordinate amounts of time - helping other alcoholics, thru AA organisation which he did up till he died a year and a half back @ 72!

Now - he's pretty miserable and doesn't want to live - because he has lost the only thing in life that really counts! Family!

Because no one else in my Family would take him back, as the only son I felt 'responsibe' to at least give him a go, so allowed him back into my life (against my better judgement) since I had 3 kids by now etc! (i.e. his grandkids!)

The last 18 years spent with my dad working in various partnerships (Deer Farming and Timber Working) did for me at least, make up for the years as a kid, I never had a old man, because he lived his life at work, the hotel and harlots houses!

During that 18 yers of time we worked together in partnerships of one sort or another, once he was sober, - I had to have a talk with my dad - as you must now have a talk with yours!

I got quite successfull at teaching fly fishing and he helped me build my first charter boat etc.... he also taught me over the last 10 years full time working together, Carpentry, Joinery, Cabinet Making, Sawmilling and kiln drying of timber & I'd been a forester for 8 years after the railways so knew a bit about growing timber already!

But My ol dad wanted me to take over and run our Timber business his way..single handed making $3 an hour the way it was done 150 years ago..with some of his great grandfathers tools!

I was used in my Railway and Forestry days to employing hundreds of men - managing annual budgets in the $10-$15M vicinity etc, i.e. managing big Govt business and being accountable for it to auditors etc!

I could not convince him to run the business BIG and profitable, he was happy pottering away in a semi type retirement occupation where everyone in the community respected him & his abilities again....after his years of alcoholism and no respect, I couldn't and didn't, take this away from him!.

As he got older and ill with cancer - I "allowed" the business to slowly 'run down' (eating into a lifetimes joint built up goodwill and capital) just so's he would be happy in his little business and position within society where he was accepted!

Before He died, I convinced him to leave our Business we had built up to my sister, who had had a crap life with a rich lawyer husband, who left her for his young secretary,with 4 kids to raise and did every dirrty under handed legal trick he could, to avoid paying any maintenance.

She needed the leg up in life more than me!

So..

I had to have a talk to my dad - to "allow me" to "shine" in a fishing career! (while still helping run our joint farm and timber businesses).

And he understood - and he did allow me to do that and I did manage to get a Charter Fishing business up after 10 years of part time work!.

And I now have a 18 year old son who is My partner in the charter fishing business!

I am doing my best to foster his interests in the ocean as my father helped me foster mine at a very early age before the booze - and at a much older age after the booze!

Your dad will understand, but you can learn a lot of good and bad things from working with your dad! He won't be around forever and when he's gone as mine is - you will wish he wasn't!

So my suggestion is compromise - talk with your dad - get him to help foster your interest in boats, and you help him enjoy his life!

When you are settled and have kids etc - your turn will come too!

Your urge to leave your dads employ has bugger all to do with you or your dad!

It is a hormonal thing designed to get young males to leave the home/village, strike out for new territory and start their own family!

It's a powerfull survival of the species thing!

If you recognise it and deal with it you can overcome it!

If you do - you will have learned perhaps the most valuable lesson of your life and your kids in the future will thank you for it! If you get it right - maybe your kids won't want to run out on you, when it's your turn to get old and cranky and fixed in your ways!!! Thats half the fun of getting old!

Chill out dude - this life's not apractice run for next time around and when it all goes to hell in a handbasket - remember that Family is all that counts in life!:!:

My 3 kids mean more than anything else to me, in my life right now, - thats why the ***** who is their mother, is still my wife!

You can put up with a LOT in your life, if you set your jaw, grit your teeth and just get the hell on with it, playing a straight bat!

Course you can do like most people - and say to hell with it - take up the booze drugs and fast loose ***** women, and blame it all on somebody else, and you'll be like 90% of society today - but you won't be a man in your own eyes or anyone elses and you will know this deep down in your own heart!!

Best you be a man & have a talk with your dad is my advice!
Your dad is probably still waiting for you to get to that stage in life!
He will be both relieved and proud when you do!
Theres no time like today! All our tmorrows are made of days like today!
Seize the day and be man!
Live life one day at a time!
The longest of journeys begins with the first step!
Before you criticize your dad, first walk a mile, in his shoes! (Yeah - thattaways - you have a free pair a shoes and a one mile head start!)

Cheers!

P.s. - you can read the rest in my book when I get round to writing it "Jarrahs, Karri's Jilgies & Jumping Trout" - 'an estoteric ramble thru the tangled shrubbery of one mans muddled mind!'

 

Thanks for the advice everyone. I have been planning on sitting down with my dad to go over what I would like to do in the future for a while now, but really havent picked out the best time to do it. Trouty gave me an idea to continue to work for my dad and down the road start building boats part time on the side and when its time to go full time I will. Thats probably the best way to go. Learn how to design these things then rent out a small warehouse and get my hands dirty. After my real job drive straight to the warehouse and get going on these boats. That could work. About the family stuff. I am 26 years old and not ready to get married anytime soon, but time does fly. I wish I could start building these boats tomorrow. I know that materials to build boats cost a butt-load and I could just start saving the money by working for my dad.

 

yes now your talking. build a boat and sell it ,,,show him your dedication, from a fathers piont of view nothing is more gratifing than knowing his son can feed himself after hes gone, it will give him great peace of mind.

 

How about starting a marine serivce shop for starters (after going to a marine mechanic school which is right next to me) which wouldnt be as difficult as starting a boat manufacturing comonay and then start a seperate division down the road to build boats. I am in the service industry now ( not boats) and I have good knowledge on how it works. Like the pros say, if you want to start a business, service is the way to go. Boats dont last forever.

 

Do I start my own dream journey

Yes of course,but wait it seems to me there is confusion here,because the motive is unclear,are you begining something because you are rebelling against The Old Man,and of course you must assert yourself sooner or later.
Or are you starting your business to show everyone who matters that you can be independent.
All of the above,are wrong motives to start a business which is new to you.?
If you want to assert yourself, go into competition with Dad.
I dont know how old you are but at around 28yrs a man begins to formulate a new identity to replace the one he came through high school, and college, and the teen years, and marriage with.
He begins to form new and unique portions of his identity,this seems to be a process that takes several years.So if you can confirm this is somthing familiar to you. May I suggest at this point you seperate this process from any business ,your old identity was based upon what you did for a living.
Do consider basing your new identity who you are as opposed to what you do.And enjoy the journey if it doesnt feel right,change it ,but change it with love and laughter,it does'nt hurt so much then when you invariably screw up because this one has to last till your mid life crisis.What a ride!!! ,Now if nothing of this makes sense, put it down to my age and forgive me .Best