Boat Jokes (we need a few laughs)

Well, that's the joke. If your part of Australia is subsiding, would you think it smart to secede from the part of Australia that wasn't?

 

I hear England is sinking... maybe that is why they won't let the Scots go, apparently Scotland is rising up, it's going to be greater than Britain in due time in any case


As I see it, rising seas shouldn't be a problem, more and more folks will just take to boating

 

Quote:
>If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

People didn't evolve from apes, they evolve into apes.<

If people originated from Afrika, why are there stll Afrikans?

 

Because some are integrating themselves back to Africans

 

Line Handling Skills 101

Watch and learn...

http://youtu.be/-OYwwrT9YUg

Haha

 

Self inflicted - speed BUMP

 

But they were having sooooo much fun before that little bump... couldn't you tell by their huge ear to ear grins and relaxed attitudes?

 

The fast boat to China ... no Australia, no Africa, no, no back to China again....

 

It is sad indeed to see a nice relaxing day on the water spoiled by an unfortunate incident. Just as there were about to pass the nibblies around and glass of white while taking in the scenery.

Poida

 

Looks like common rap and head banging to me. I hope it doesn't catch on... Snoopy Dog will become Snoopy Water Dog and "*****" will become "Fish".

I think it's a matter of reckless overconfidence with chicks to show off and scare...

 

While the media isn't reporting it there's a big to do building in Colorado right now.

Seems a herd of cattle got loose and is eating its way through the fields of the State's biggest pot grower.

One commentator said the steaks couldn't get any higher.

 

I went to the doctors with a steering wheel stuck to my pants. The doc said it must driving me nuts.

 

A young man appeared in family court asking to be removed from his home because his step-father had beat him.

When asked by the judge if he would like to live with his father, the kid replied "No, he beats me."

When asked the same about his mother, he replied "No, she beats me too."

When asked by the judge who he would like to live with, the kid replied "I want to live with the Jacksonville Jaguars, because they don't beat anybody."

 

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay
guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand,
"You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return.

Two o'clock and no hired hand.

Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots."

He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

"Now take off my socks."

He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

"Now take off my skirt."

He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

"Now take off my bra."

Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said,
"If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired."

 

Two men are sitting drinking coffee, talking about politics. One says to the other,

"So Harry, how come you're a Democrat anyways?"

"Well Stan, you see my father was a Democrat, and his father, he was a democrat too."

"In that case, what would you have been if your father and his father were horse thieves?"

"I suppose I would have been a Republican."