BOAT JOKES (we need a few laughs)

Discussion in 'All Things Boats & Boating' started by brian eiland, Oct 29, 2006.

  1. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

  2. thudpucker
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    thudpucker Senior Member

    LOL, I've seen people looking like that at small dilemma's, such as are we really seeing what it looks like we are seeing?
     
  3. Dirteater
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    Dirteater Senior Member

    :confused:


    (kidding)
     
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  4. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

    [​IMG]
     
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  5. thudpucker
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    thudpucker Senior Member

    Great sign. That sign should have been in front of the I-5 bridge over the Skagit river in Washington state.
     
  6. lewisboats
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    lewisboats Obsessed Member

  7. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

  8. philSweet
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    philSweet Senior Member

    About that bridge- if you're bored and want to watch about fifty different vehicles crashing into it, a guy has had cameras up for five years.

    http://11foot8.com/
     
  9. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

  10. hoytedow
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    hoytedow Wood Butcher

    Who does he think he is, Solyndra?
     
  11. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

  12. HakimKlunker
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    HakimKlunker Andreas der Juengere

    A small foreign boat in a small foreign marina; the proceeding evening causes daylight to fade.
    The Skipper went shopping for some supplies while the Mrs.(and only crew) began to prepare dinner. When it started to rain she realized after a while that all deck hatches were still open. It was a little too late though and the cushions were already pretty wet. So as a first measure she threw lots of towels around to soak up the water. She then realized that she had forgotten about the laundry in the cockpit. Rushing outside she slipped on the wet stairs of the companionway, hit her head hard on something sharp and spilt quite some blood. Something fell into the water, but she was distracted with wiping off blood with one of the shirts from the said laundry.
    She next rushed to the head to wash off the blood from her face and get some plaster from the first aid kit. When she noticed the smell of something burning: One of the drying towels had landed next to the stove and had caught fire. She first threw the burning food into the cockpit, together with the cooking knife, that had somehow found the way into the pot. With the fire extinguisher she managed to stop the flames, although the wet cushions suffered even more now. As the rain meanwhile had stopped, she opened all deck hatches to get the smoke out of the boat.
    The coast guard arrived on the scene. The article that went over board earlier, had been the EPIRP (self activating of course).
    What they saw was this:
    A boat smoking from all its hatches. The cockpit covered with blood, bruised clothing and there was a knife within a mess of what could have been intestines of sorts. The lady, restricted in foreign communication skills, was taken in for further investigation.
    Meanwhile Skipper returned from shopping and found his boat in some disorder. As the Mrs., in her attempt to stop the blaze, had forgotten to turn off the water in the shower, the floorboards where now afloat. Skipper could not find his crew and with what he saw he concluded that something terrible must have happened. He dashed off to alarm the police, who immediately launched a search party.
    Meanwhile the Mrs. had been able to explain the mishap, and the coast guard released her. While she was on the way back to the boat, the policemen on their rescue mission crossed her way and because of her deranged appearance she was found to be suspicious. She was immediately taken to the police station for further investigation. Which lasted all night.
    The unsettled Skipper meanwhile cleared up the boat and got it back into reasonable condition. He found no sleep of course and so in the early morning turned up at the police station, where to his excitement he found his crew. However, the following paper work and explanations lasted the rest of the day.
    In the evening the couple finally managed to come to a sort of normal life again. So she began with preparations for dinner, while Skipper went shopping to replace some lost supplies.
    It started to rain.
     
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  13. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member

    [​IMG]

    apologies if already posted
     
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  14. ImaginaryNumber
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    ImaginaryNumber Imaginary Member


  15. Angélique
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    Angélique aka Angel (only by name)

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