Dumbest Move Ever Seen

Similarly this gentleman (Bob) his son and my son went a-fishing in a small runnabout. With the vessel drifting in the current with fish visible on the bottom and a little flustered he took an anchor from the locker dropped it overboard, just in time one of the boys noticed the bitter end was not made fast and they hung on pulled in some slack and Bob unable to find a cleat prompty tied the rode to the portable chair leg and sat in it. First fish he caught the chair went overboard when he excitedly stood up.

 

Two idiots who had a couple too may went fishing, launched the boat without drain plugs. The boat sank on the trailer, and their pickup was too weak to pull the boat out. With all the spinning and buggering around they did succeed in getting the pickup more into the water, the water was comming into the doors already then. The boat was in the water completely submerged. We were fishing a competition there, but since the guys were drunk decided to help them only later if they sobered up some, so we were away most the day.

Then they started picking on one of the campers who also refused to help them since they were in such a contaminated condition. The camper had a nice looking doughter who had to bear some unasked and rude comments.

These two didn't have plans to sober up any, so they sat in their pickup in the water dirnking all day. When we got back off the water a police van appeared.

Aparently the camper was the head of some police bla bla bla big shot. The police grabbed the two nut heads, threw them into the police van and partied the rest of the night with the camper and family. Dunno what happened to these two. When we left the next day their pickup and boat was still in the water as the day before.

 

guess they may have learned a bit of a lesson by then! But maybe not!

 

What a great topic

Hard to come up with the dumbest out of so many

The California Coast Guard tells of a 40' sailboat asking for directions from several miles offshore; when they boarded the skipper was navigating from San Francisco to Los Angeles using a Texaco road map.

While I was living aboard in a Southern California marina, a guy shows up one night in a 40' 1960's wooden Owens that he had just bought, attempting to dock it for the first time by straddling the bow and rowing using a single paddle from a rowboat -- he was really tired out, too! I pushed him in with the dink and taught him how to tie it up...

 

I think that story is more cute than anything else Good on you for helping him out!

 

I once saw a sailing yacht come into New Bedford Mass. and in the process of tying up at the gas dock the helmsman told his crew to pull the drifting bow into the pier. She (standing on the bow of the boat) grabs the bow line (tied to the bow cleat) and while still standing on the foredeck proceeds to pull for all she is worth... Clearly not a physics major.
I turned away so as not to embarrass her but judging by the string of blue words I heard coming from the helm (having to do with intellect and its relationship to gender) I think she got a quick and painful lesson in yachting physics.

 

More...

Thanks Danish Bagger!! You've inspired me to write more. I swear these stories are all true.

There was the couple, 30 miles offshore in the Pacific, in a 17' Center Console... Waving frantically at me. They were both wearing swim suits, painfully sunburned. good looking, successful yuppie types. First time on the Ocean, convinced they were out of gas, had seaweed wrapped around the prop of the outboard. To this day I am certain they didn't realize that I probably saved thier lives. Her comment to me "We got way offshore really fast" -- like this was a good thing.

There was the wooden Grand Banks 32 off the back side of Catalina Island, again in the Pacific, fairly rough day, wife's frying hamburgers on the propane stove while underway, grease splatters, catches on fire, she freaks, drops the whole thing on the teak/holly sole of the salon -- the boat's on the bottom in seven minutes. Witnessed this from a few miles off, fortunately the coasties were close.

Sitting in the marina one day shooting the breeze with my dockmates and we hear a ferocious blast, followed by a huge cloud of black smoke. Two guys partnered on a new boat, a 45' wooden replica of a Chinese Junk. On thier first day of ownership they were cleaning the engine, with gasoline soaked rags, sat back to admire thier work, and lit a cigarette.

One day out sailing hear the radio blasting Mayday Mayday Mayday... The excited skipper is out of fuel, being blown towards a rocky shore (Anacapa Island). We follow them up to channel 22A, and when the Coast Guard gets to the description of the vessel our jaws drop when the captain says "We are a 30' sailboat, white hull..."

The guy in the slip next to me two years ago, with an old Chris Craft, who comes in with his wooden mast broken -- and proceeds to "fix it" with Elmers glue-all while the wife watches approvingly.

The Previous Owner of my boat, a 34' trawler, who plumbed the bilge pump with garden hose and re-wired the running lights with orange extension cord (and the requsite balls of sticky electrical tape).

And then just last week I come across this:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Dies...ryZ80653QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

Which completely speaks for itself.

 

Then there was the salesman in the fancy boat shop. Guy comes in and says "I'm interested in the Blue motor yacht" Salesman sez OK wanna take her out? "Yep".

So out they go, the guy looks like he knows what he's doing runs around a bit and they all go back to the office to talk money! Half way through the talking the salesman looks up and sees the motor boat drifting away down the dock! **** he cries didn't you tie her up you idiot he shouts at the guy!

"No but I took heo out of gear, thought that would be OK"!


British Naval Cutter running into Aden, guy on the bow standing up so proud in his whites, first day on the job, steadying himself with the painter held short and taut! as they come into the jetty with a load of Officers in the boat, the guy jumps for the jetty! **** he cries and disappears down between the boat and the jetty - splash! H'e kept the line taut and short and run out of 'string' which pulled him back towards the boat and down....... Standing at the other end of the boat holding the tiller I was so busy laughing I ran over the numptieand hit the jetty with a crash - Officers all over the bloody place, but wetting themselves as well! Picks themselves up and saying don't worry coxn we'd have done the same we rescues this fool in the water! You can guess the rest!

 

Sigh! People with automatics …

 

Ant Steward sailed a good portion of the way around the world navigating with a sextant and a school atlas. Rumors go that when he sailed off a page he tore it out and threw it overboard.

Good read if you have a moment : Anthony Steward - Around Alone in a Open Boat

 

Isn't that how everybody does it?

 

Couple of hundred years everyone sailed around without maps or a school atlas. Are we getting dumber ?

 

Nope, just better at map reading I guess (and better maps)!

 

Nope, we just live longer.

 

I've read the piece...

Not so sure Tuks. There's one place he got food poison from eating raw fish. I'm sure there's lots of ways to thin the rope you walk on.


Te-he it can only be a South African. I would have understood if he left 'cos he got fed up with our current gov but on the other hand it may have been the only way he'd gotten the wife... ahem