Boat Jokes (we need a few laughs)

Thank you for calling me irrational just because I refuse to accept that kind of disgusting jokes. Very nice on your side.

You should carefully consider there are 14 years old boys members of these forums, not to talk about the variety of visitors.

 

Guillermo, get over it.
Poida

 

This gentlemen is going nowhere and will end up as one of those suicidal sessions we seem so good at every now and then, in which we bash the hell out of each other then stomp off in high dudgeon! Every body then looses out!

Personnally I'm with Guillermo all the way on this one but let us just say that there are certain so called 'jokes' (the thing that makes a joke funny is the fact that IT IS LIFE - ONLY LARGER) which go past the acceptable level that so called civilised people will tolerate. As Guillemo said what you will tell in private amongst a selected few is completely different from what should be stated on an open international forum which all may view (we have ladies on this forum, some post some wifes and some just like to read with a view to possibly getting involved at a latter date - there are certain sites out there which cater for all sorts of perversions (not just sexual) if you want one of those go to it - this forum is primarly about boats! Some do digress somewhat but basically it remains ABOUT BOATS. Let us for the sake of propiety and the forum simply remember there are certain things that should not be mentioned here and leave it at that!

Thankee

 

Love you, Walrusy!

 

we are all worriors ,,,sailors......and gentelman,,,,,lets show it ,,,longliner

 

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

This is the sickest joke I could imagine. These poor animals live a horrible life in cages. millions are killed every day for no other reason than something to eat. Their eggs are taken from them and smashed to make scrambled eggs.

Is it right that we should sneer and laugh at there inability to cross the road.

Chickens can not cross the road safely and they could come to serious harm. Is this the message we want our children the hear.

This joke is just sick.

 

Ah Frosty, even those that hate you have got to laugh at your thoughts sometimes, you are really down to earth, now get out of the dirt and you will feel better.

 

Why did the chicken cross the road?

THE PRISONER's Answer:

Why did you cross the road, Number Six?
Do you seriously expect a response? Is that question directed at me? Surely not, as I am a chicken, of flesh and blood, wing and claw, not a number, and not - I might add - a party to this pathetic charade.

Come now, Number Six - let us put aside our customary banter. We have footage of you crossing the road, pursued by one of our security globes. Did you think to escape by crossing the road? To - perhaps - reach the tidal flats?
What I think is my own business - as I am not a creature under your sway like these other colorfully-attired, clown-like chickens.

There are no chickens here, Number Six. You and I know that. This village is the province of words. Important words. Words - as my predecessors have stressed - which you must utter in order to move, ahem, on. Two simple words, really. We don't ask much. Just an acknowledgment of reality.
Don't you mean lies? Isn't the truth of it that this village is a graveyard for chickens who have outlived their usefulness? Chickens of any color? White? Red? As a chicken who chooses self-determination over velocipedes, games of chess with actual chickens as pieces, ridiculous outfits, and golf carts with funny roofs, yes - I crossed the road. Why? Because I damn well felt like it. And you can go straight to Hell or whatever pressure cooker or deep fryer you came from.

http://www.chickenjoke.com/

 

Guillermo,

Are you getting clucky?

 

Medical Terms From Ireland

Artery......................... The study of paintings
Bacteria....................... Back door to cafeteria
Barium......................... What doctors do when patients die
Benign......................... What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section.........A neighbourhood in Rome
Catscan........................ Searching for Kitty
Cauterize...................... Made eye contact with her
Colic............................ A sheep dog
Coma........................... A punctuation mark
*****.......................... Not a friend
Fester......................... ....Quicker than someone else
Fibula.......................... ....A small lie
Impotent........................ Distinguished, well known
Labour Pain.....................Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff.................. A Doctor's cane
Morbid.......................... ...A higher offer
Nitrates....................... .....Cheaper than day rates
Node........................... .....I knew it
Outpatient..................... ...A person who has fainted
Pelvis......................... .......Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative................ A letter carrier
Recovery Room................ Place to do upholstery
Rectum......................... .....Nearly killed him
Secretion...................... .....Hiding something
Seizure........................ .......Roman emperor
Tablet......................... .......A small table
Terminal Illness............... .Getting sick at the airport
Tumour.............................One plus one more
Urine.......................... .......Opposite of you're out
2 x Condoms....................To be sure, to be sure!


Anyone aghast at this blatant culturist list?

Pericles

 

Bad Jokes

I'm away for quite sometime and too buzy to looks in here,wow.. the jokes thread is still hot and thriving! Bom dia Amigo Guillermo totally agree with what you had writen sir. Surprise to see Walrus writing in queens English..wow..! Walrus you are not in Malaysia last August to celebrate 'Merdeka' day ?Theres alot of British vaterans invited.Frosty..looks like you do enjoy poking the hornet nest!

 

Boat jokes

Excellent observation Frosty. You never fail to amaze

So we'll try a different tack....Why did the chewing gum cross the road ?



A: Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot....

 

a joke is a joke, thats all>


Like this.....?

 

Bon día, Amigo Ari! Welcome back!
And thanks for your support. (The same to Berg, Vkrue, Tim & Mike)

Most probably! I'm feeling an irresistible needing of "cacarear"....