I just realised I'm rich....

I usually avoid giving an opinion on something I don't understand, but each to his own.

As an englishman I am conscious of a need to express criticism carefully, in a manner calculated to produce a positive reaction rather than pointless anger. It was explained to me while still a child that this can be done without loss of truth and is the mark of a considerate adult.

I must admit that anger can still strip off my gloss of politeness, but it is difficult to see what excuse there is for anger in the subject of this thread or in the early post.

In my time in England - before moving to Canada - I met large numbers of nice folk who possessed verbal skills, patience, and concern for the wellbeing of others, allowing them to couch criticism - where justified - in an acceptable manner. As the occasional recipient, I appreciated the effort and it helped me to understand and correct my shorcomings. Brutal honesty, insults and other cutting remarks don't seem to work that way.

I mention this because I do not want anyone who might wish to visit that historic realm to fail to do so simply to avoid rudeness; even cab drivers are polite and helpful! England is a multicultural country, far more so than when I left, but you don't need to be a trained diplomat to make your way there. People will make allowances for you, just like they do for Frosty.

 

Frosty: being hateful is very different from being honest. You try to hide your rudeness and venom behind a patina of honesty, but it is clear what you are .

 

Terry thanks for the PM - much appreciated

 

Seems Brits have a bit of a chubby problem too!

Chubby English

 

Whom do I 'hate' Gonzo please explain yourself...... Hate ??? Who the unfortunate wheel chaired down syndrome recipients,--or maybe the 16 year old thalidomide or did you miss that bit?

I am of course willing to accept your argument/ comment if you were to post any rudeness or venom but I notice your a bit weak in that respect.

I have given more money away tonight as it happens. Is there no end to my hatred for the poor and needy. Since you ask my hatred extends to UN type charity. No--I give it the them ,--- to their face and not under a guise of saving a one legged transsexual orangutan in Kotakinabaloo.


I do not appreciate this spot light. Please post on other threads.

Plenty to look at.

 

There's a difference between explaining to someone in a professional setting why they didn't qualify for a loan, and going out of one's way to join the conversation in a social setting to insult them.

Most of what Frosty tries to pass off as 'brutal honesty' is actually gratuitous hostility, and/or simple poor manners. For example, what constructive purpose does it serve to say people in the US weigh 400 kilos?

 

Well Frosty, if you don't appreciate the spotlight, get off the stage.

 

Interesting subject on brutal honesty gentlemen. I would say that as honesty leaves the lips it is not brutal, but if the recipient finds it offensive then it may be considered by them brutal. In other words it is subject your interpretation.

As in ---there is no such thing as an intimidator only the intimidated.

You can not be insulted without your own permission.


Gonzo --you put me in the spot light then tell me to get out of it --brilliant.


I am true and honest if you find that brutel then its your problem,,,, Don't you think USA could do with a bit of it.......

 

Looxury!
I first left home at 14 and lived in my girlfriend's parent's cellar. When I turned
16 I went on the dole, and loved it. Apart from about 10 boring working years
I've been technically unemployed but extremely happy my whole life.
And I'm still with that girl 42 years later.

I gave up grumbling after seeing a blind girl taking statistics classes, and a
thalidomide victim taking lecture notes in my wife's law class. Any problem I had
instantly looked minor by comparison.

I don't own much, but I don't want or need much.
So, Troy, I feel pretty rich too!

 

Truth is in the content, brutality is in the manner. Brutal was your own choice of word BTW . . .

Frosty, I went back over the entire thread reading your posts looking for one that could be construed to be either positive or constructive. It wasn’t enjoyable, but there was#34 and some of #41. I thought #57 was great and appropriate to this thread - it’s good to see you making an effort. The rest need a little work.


These following quotes reflect some people’s opinions of the way you write, and clearly show a wish for you to either change your manner or go away:

"I'm just being honest" is the oldest excuse in the world for being gratuitously rude and obnoxious . . . Frosty: being hateful is very different from being honest . . . Most of what Frosty tries to pass off as 'brutal honesty' is actually gratuitous hostility . . . Well Frosty, if you don't appreciate the spotlight, get off the stage . . .

They certainly qualify as brutally honest. I could almost sympathize - I would not like to receive such comments myself. But you’re not being honest about them. After all, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

 

There is no such thing as brutal honesty. That is an excuse used by people that want to inflict their brutality on others.

 

Hmmm…some ‘lost in translation’…perhaps? The point I’m making has nothing to do with formal acceptance from a professional bank manger, nor a social conversation.

The point being that most people come onto this website, inter alia, to obtain ‘advice’ of sorts. The result of the advice is not the issue, but the advice given and the manner in which it is presented and thus coupled with the recipient’s behaviour/reaction to such advice.

Again I think this depends upon how this is received. One can either elect to ignore it, treat it as rubbish, question its validity or become inflamed by it. The statement has not changed, whichever is selected as the response to it - only the “observers” position on the statement as such is the variable. A case of don’t shot the messenger.

But, this of course goes one step back to the point of should such a statement have been made to begin with? But that opens up another can of worms

……….and whilst I enjoy banter as much as anyone (and not offended by someone’s personal opinion no matter how different or poisonous it may be) and at times pop into the “not chatting about boats” threads, I prefer to keep this website for its MO…boats and all things marine related!. Not existentialism and the meaning of life etc…….

Since 2 things that should never be discussed at a table of non-friends/acquaintances; religion and politics. For the very obvious reasons. This website is no different in that regard.

 

"A reflection of thankfulness" Whats so hard to understand about the opening theme of this thread. I have just gone thru the most "reflection of thankfulness" week of my life. As a young kid our familys transportation was 14 dogs--two dog teams. Our home, a real log cabin. Dirt poor why we couldn't even afford the dirt.This past week I travelled over 1000 miles in my favourite aged Jeep and spent some 5 days moose hunting with old school friends in the most beautiful wilderness in the world. At 68yrs. old and in good health, I have much to feel rich about. Thank you Troy as I thought I was going all wimpy and soft.---Geo.

 

Interesting issue about your 'brutally honest' opinions is the fact you can't handle brutal honesty yourself.

If for example I stated that you're an over the hill old & pompous, frustrated non achiever *** living like as do many suspect Brits in kiddy fiddler land where hookers and beer are both cheap you would complain but that is my brutal honesty.

 

OK, I'm a little lost. I believe you mentioned that your job involves telling people in your professional capacity things they might not want to hear, such as why they can't possibly qualify for a loan (just an example). I don't see the relevance to being rude in a social setting, as Frosty has been doing.

I wasn't asking for anyone's advice when I started this thread, and Frosty hasn't given any that's relevant to the subject.

If you're also trying to say it's acceptable in polite company for Frosty (or someone else) to say whatever he wants, because the only thing that counts is the listeners' responses, I must respectfully disagree. No one should have carte blanche to step into the middle of a conversation and barf on the rug, just because we aren't forced to take him seriously.

I certainly didn't start this thread with either religion or politics in mind. Unfortunately, there are those who believe everything that's said must be assiduously mined for one or the other, no matter how innocent the original statement might seem to normal people.