Idiot posts cluttering up the forum

[charmc]

I had failed posts and could not access forum pages for several hours this afternoon my time, that would be early evening GMT. From what others are saying, sounds like there were server problems today?

[Jeff]

13455
There was a huge load spike between 1:00 and 2:00 EST time today that tipped the monitoring; at 6:52 EST I recompiled php and apache to make some adjustments which required them to be pulled offline for a few minutes as well. We might have to add a php cache / accelerator at some point in the near future to keep up with the spikes in traffic.

To Jack: you were right - at some point a long while back a plugin was added to exclude forums 13 and 27 from the new & getdaily search.

[charmc]

A rare find, indeed! A moderator willing to explain, even admit to problems. Jeff, you're a good man. Give yourself some more points. :) :) :)

[Frosty]

13455

To Jack: you were right - at some point a long while back a plugin was added to exclude forums 13 and 27 from the new & getdaily search.

What happened? --What did I do? ----Did I do something good?

ooh -ooh---maybe I got some points --naaa still 49--bummer.


Still gotta search for 'Idiot posts'.

[safewalrus]

Jack:confused: :confused: :confused: :mad: :mad: :mad: :D

If there'd been an ignore button for you I might have pressed it (but extracting the wee wee is more fun!)

[Frosty]

Walrust If my rep point engine was working I would give you neg reps.

Firstly for smiley abuse, you use too many,-- leave some for others.

Finally for talking dirty with no respect,---and in front of Jeff like that!!!.

I think the point bucket is empty theres none left, thats why I cant give any out.

Can some on refill the point bucket please.

[Bergalia]

Just for you Jack........:D

[longliner45]

bergy ,,do you own a twisted sister cd collection ? once again ,,in SW ohio you would be known as ,,,,,,not right,,,,,,,,good one bergy,longliner

[Bergalia]

bergy ,,do you own a twisted sister cd collection ?

Nope. But I've got a couple of really weird brothers.....:)

[marshmat]

Love the worms, Berg. Might just mail a print of that one to the local MP next time they decide to bring up some controversial old bill that nobody really wants to hear about anymore :D

[safewalrus]

Bergalia - like it, just what I always wanted, a tin of worms!

Jack just for you - :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :p :p :cool: :cool: :P :P :D :D :D :D

[Frosty]

That looks like a can of corned beef. The little --- darlings have eaten it all.

[Bergalia]

That looks like a can of corned beef. The little --- darlings have eaten it all.

Damn it Jack. I borrowed that can from the Martin Luther Museum...part of his strict eating regime...:(

[Frosty]

Ducks eat worms --we eat ducks --worms eat us.

Words to a very famous song --So famous that only a few Yorkshire people know about it.

No Scott would recognise these words.

[Bergalia]

No Scott would recognise these words.


'Where hast tha' bin sin' ah saw thee ? On Ilkley Moor ba't'hat...
'I've bin a courtin Mary Jane...On Ilkley moor ba't'hat...on Ilkley Moor ba't'hat...
ete etc
"Tha'll ketch thee death of cold...on Ilkley Moor ba't'hat...on Ilkley Moor ba't'hat....'
etc etc etc etc

No Jack...never heard of it...How does it go ??????

[Frosty]

Naa ---you got the tune wrong.

[Bergalia]

Naa ---you got the tune wrong.

Right again Jack...I was confusing it with 'The muckin' o geordie's byre...'

But I had the words 'drummed' into me when I used to go 'bouldering' on the Cow and Calf on Ilkley Moor (close to Harry Ramsden's - best fish and chips in the world....)

Threw in the 'fish' part to keep Jeff happy in case he thinks we've gone off the 'boating' thread.....:D

[Frosty]

YOU WENT TO HARRY RAMSDENS??????

I was last there in 1962-3 I think i remember seeing you now.

Where you the little retarded kid that would not stop throwing chips at my dad.

You must remember ( well maybe not if your retarded) Are you Ok now.

I was the black kid in a wheel chair.

[Bergalia]

YOU WENT TO HARRY RAMSDENS??????
I was last there in 1962-3 I think i remember seeing you now. I was the black kid in a wheel chair.

How could I forget Jack. If I recall it right I mistook you for a piece of black pudding which had been dropped on the floor and fed it to my dog.The dog was violently sick and Harry insisted I scrape it up - which I did and deposited it in the 'mushy peas' vat....So how come you ended up in Thailand... :)

[safewalrus]

So that's why the mushy peas were off? I thought it was because somebody had been sick in 'em and all the while it was far worse........

[Frosty]

Well its a long story really, but because I was a black kid with humengous cronic hemeroids I was hospitalised or pushed about in a wheel chair for most of the time. My Father, a coal miner from Crapton just outside Buttockshill thought I was one of his till my mother cough up one day.

As you can see from my avitar which was taken at Harry Ramsdens at the outsales desk.

Oh those were the days, we would spend a lot of time at Harries, I think my dad was hoping someone would feel sorry for me and steel me. He would leave me for hours --or was it days crawling around the salt and vinigar table in amongst the newspapers.

Living on salt n vinigar made my hemeroids worse till one day they exploded. This made such a mess it was harry himself that was sick in the peas. I was taken away by the RSPCA.

Any way I was put in a crate and posted to Bangkok after playing 'pin the tale on the donkey' with a world map. Boy was I lucky,-- Ifit in here perfectly.

I was brought up as a mahoot so didnt need a wheel chair any more.

How about you?

[Poida]

Nah idiots aren't cluttering up posts.

[Bergalia]

Well its a long story really... Living on salt n vinigar made my hemeroids worse till one day they exploded....I was taken away by the RSPCA.....I was put in a crate and posted to Bangkok...

Sorry Jack, but the story I heard was that the RSPCA posted the haemorrhoid to Bangkok...you stayed behind (if I can use that term...):)

[Frosty]

you spell hemaroids differently to me.

Im going to Mc donalds for a sausuage Mc Muffin with egg in the morning.

[Bergalia]

you spell hemaroids differently to me.
I think you spell haemorrhoids differently to everyone Jack. :)

[Frosty]

I dont care,-- Im still going to Mc Donalds

[Bergalia]

You'll get haemorrhoids :P

[safewalrus]

Bet it will be 'piles' of fun! :eek: It will to us! ;) Might stop ye bumming around!:P :D

[Frosty]

The last time I saw my proctologist at Royal prince Albert hosptal in Sydney, she said ---yes I said she, after sticking a camera 30cm up my rear end.

That I had a perfect anus.

In the 2 page report it concluded as saying "an unremarkable anus"

Ile bet not a lot of you can say that.

The camera thing is not nice --doesnt hurt just a bit uncomfortable and yes you can feel every inch --or you think you can. At 40cm she apologised at being a bit to intrusive but said while we are here you have a filling that needs looking at on one of your back teeth.

Now thats what I call value for your money.

[Poida]

Isn't it ironical?

The thread that gets the most idiots cluttering it up, is the one titled "Idiot Posts Cluttering up the Forum."

Poida

[Bergalia]

The last time I saw my proctologist at Royal prince Albert hosptal in Sydney, she said ---yes I said she, after sticking a camera 30cm up my rear end.
That I had a perfect anus.

Wouldn't it have been simpler to consult the Russian Navy?????

[Bergalia]

Isn't it ironical?The thread that gets the most idiots cluttering it up, is the one titled "Idiot Posts Cluttering up the Forum."
Poida

Jeff, Jeff sir...Poida's being philosopical.....:(

[Frosty]

Isn't it ironical?

The thread that gets the most idiots cluttering it up, is the one titled "Idiot Posts Cluttering up the Forum."

Poida

I like it here, I can always find you and Berg.

[safewalrus]

Yes Jack an unremarkable anus, unlike the noises that continually come out of it, which is pure poo!!

[Frosty]

Wally can I have your old avatar? I need it for the dart board.

[Bergalia]

Oy....whatever happened to 'Tansails' who started this Idiot thread ?

[Frosty]

Hey i just thought that maybe we should divide your post with your points and get a rep point ratio number.

This does not include however those who dont look.

So for me thats Ah who gives a @#$%^

[Frosty]

Its gone a bit quiet---YO BERG Hello--ARE YOU ASLEEP?

[Bergalia]

Its gone a bit quiet---YO BERG Hello--ARE YOU ASLEEP?

Stop shouting Jack. I'm here now...what's the problem????

Don't tell me Wilma has landed in Thailand........ :D

[Frosty]

What?

Your joking?

Oh NO,-- she wants me to design an ironing table for a blue water 22 footer that can double up as a operating table for the elderly, and a splash proof fire resistant chart table, that can double up for child berth and wallpapering.

Ok thats me stuffed

Do you know any big words to describe being in the deep **** Berg?

[Bergalia]

... she wants me to design an ironing table for a blue water 30 footer that can double up as a operating table for the elderly....

Is that the reversable ironing-board which can also accomodate a five-piece orchestra and mud-wrestling pit ?

The word you were looking for is 'rendering' - (a system whereby US/UK/Australian security services fly you to a 'neutral' country where the crap is beaten out of you until you confess to terrorist activities (script supplied by said security services) and are then transfered to a tropical island retreat (Cuba) and held in solitary confinement without trial and ignored by your government for at least five years...or until a federall election is called. :)

[Frosty]

Oooooh --- 'rendering' sounds good .

Can I have the last week in july and the first week in August?

Thats when me holidays are this year. EErr I cant stay 5 years though.

Ille have to ask me mum.