Be a friend to Alan White Appeal

[Bergalia]

Many members will be aware of Alan White. A reasonably dull chap whose contributions have helped pad out various threads - even though adding nothing of worth to the subject discussed. (But what can you expect from an American). Alan, like the spotted slug, surgical leech, and plague bacillus feels unwanted. unloved, and friendless (which is possibly true - especially as he bites his own toenails...) However I call on my fellow members to sign the following petition to become a 'nominal' friend to Alan.

"I would like to register as a friend to Alan White:"

Osama Bin Laden; A. Hitler; M.Tojo; Fred Bundy; H.Crippen; Bergalia; Idi Amin (retd).

[longliner45]

why should I be freinds to allen ? every weekend I work on my boat,,and yet he never shows up to help,,,,,,,damn that allen,,,,,,longliner

[artemis]

I would like to register as he's an American - well, he lives in Maine, but that's still in America, barely. And I know a couple of hobby steamboaters who live in Maine and keep their steamboats there (they have great "outings" in the winter, nice and warm!), so that makes Maine OK too. Sign me up
Ron

[alan white]

Hello,

This is Alan's Maid, Claudette. I am French, so excusing the bad English. I can tell you, Mr. White is no easy of be a friend. He is too much with helping of not fortunate people and adopting animals. I do with my legs just a little, with skirt accidental riding up, but non! He laugh and saying I am too eager.
No, he is like a stone. A wonderful handsome and verile stone. He is like a shining star, or a moonbeam, or something.

[alan white]

Sorry about that, guys. Claudette has received a spanking. I am going to go back to signing in each time and avoid this happening again.
I don't know about you, but having 105 lbs of squirming, shrieking French maid on your lap is not the same as a 40 lb toddler! What a chore!

A.

[Frosty]

Oh I know --I know --its no fun --why do they do that ? do they think we like it or something. I had that last night in almost evey bar I went to. I had to come home at 1.30 with sore buttocks.

Any way allen I have Pm you my credit card number and pin so just help yourelf.

I would appreciate it however if you kept my donation the the Alen White "save a French maid fund" fund to under 10 united states of America dollars.

Oh --Errr make that 2 us dollar.

[charmc]

I'll contribute to the "save a French maid fund", but I'm earmarking my donation for new glasses for Claudette. She obviously needs them.

[alan white]

Get her some new panties too, Charlie. I don't what they call those string-things, but every time she leans over to pick up my slippers, those poor red cheeks make my heart sink. I should have used ointment afterwards.
Next time.

[alan white]

Originally Posted by Frosty

Oh I know --I know --its no fun --why do they do that ? do they think we like it or something. I had that last night in almost evey bar I went to. I had to come home at 1.30 with sore buttocks.

Any way allen I have Pm you my credit card number and pin so just help yourelf.

I would appreciate it however if you kept my donation the the Alen White "save a French maid fund" fund to under 10 united states of America dollars.

Oh --Errr make that 2 us dollar.

Thankyou, Frosty. It's a shame your night was cut short. Next time, stick to drinking only!
Bottoms up!

[safewalrus]

I would greatly like to be a 'friend' to Alan White but first Max, just one small question

WHO?

[PI Design]

Is Maine nice? Is he rich? Will he give me rep points? If yes to all, I'll be his friend.

[safewalrus]

If he knows Guillermo is he known as the "Spanish Main"?

[Poida]

Allan's not my friend, my Mother died while she was standing next to an Allan.

Poida

[alan white]

Originally Posted by Poida

Allan's not my friend, my Mother died while she was standing next to an Allan.

Poida

She should never have stood up on that rocking horse. At 96, a person should remain seated until the ride stops. You got to come to grips with the fact that your mom was a daredevil she of all people knew the risks and accepted them.:even madder.

[PI Design]

I suppose statistically most Aussie women die next to a bloke called Bruce. So your mum was quite lucky in a way.