Boat Jokes (we need a few laughs)

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Notice: Superbowl Tickets

I know it’s late notice, but a friend of mine has two tickets for the Super Bowl in Minneapolis, MN at the new U.S. Bank Stadium on Sunday February 4th.

They are box seats and he paid $3,500 per ticket, which includes the ride to and from the airport, lunch, dinner, a $400.00 bar tab and a pass to the winners locker room after the game.

What he didn't realize when he bought them last year was that it’s on the same day as his WEDDING.

If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.

It's at St. Paul's Church at 3 pm. Her name is Ashley. She’s 5'4", about 115 pounds, a good cook, loves to fish and hunt and will clean your truck. She'll be the one in the white dress.

 

Communist don't like Earl Grey Tea because all proper tea is theft.

 

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Cockpit or Joke ?​

 

LMAO

 

"Tonight's the night" reminds me of a song:

 

Gordon died. So Susan went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Susan what she would like to say about Gordon.

Susan replied, "You just put, 'Gordon died.'"

The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, said, "That's it? Just 'Gordon died?'

Surely, there must be something more you'd like to say about Gordon. If it's money you're concerned about, the first five words are free. We really should say something more."

So Susan pondered for a few minutes and finally said, "O.K., then. You put 'Gordon died. Sailboat for sale.'

 

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Thread: Tanker Proa ---> Post #56​

 

A bank robber turned on the patrons, witnesses, and demanded of the first: "Did you see me rob this bank?"

Theman said "Yes." and was promptly shot for his trouble.

The bank robber demanded the same of a married couple next in line.

"I didn't," said the woman, "but I'm sure my husband did!"

 

Is it true Paris Hilton carries her chihuahua because someone told her, "After your dog poops, pick it up."?

 

‘‘After your dog poops, pick it up’’ is common knowledge Hoyt, many people do that...​

The first one obviously did it on the escalator, while some others did it in the house . . ​

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There's 6 more at the above link...​