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#3121
11-20-2009, 07:23 AM
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| A seven-year old boy was at the center of a courtroom drama yesterday at the Pretoria High court when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to Bafana Bafana whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
__________________ Regards Fanie Water ! Just gimme water !  |
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#3123
11-21-2009, 06:47 AM
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| Who Will Be Boss..... When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be the boss. The brain said to the other parts of the body, Since I control everything and do all the thinking, therefore I should be boss! And the feet said, Since I carry Man where he wants to go and get him in position to do what the brain wants, so I should be boss! And the hands said, Since I do all the work and earn all the money to keep the rest of you going, I should be boss instead! And the eyes said, Since I must look out for all of you and tell you where danger lurks, surely I should be boss! And so were the mouth, the lungs and the heart arguing over who should be the boss and finally the butt spoke up and demanded that he should be made boss. All of the other parts broke out in laughter at the idea of a butt being made boss. The butt was very angry and felt so insulted that he decided to block himself off and refused to let anything come out of it. Soon after several days and weeks, the brain was feverish, the eyes crossed and ached, the feet became too weak to walk, the hands hung limply at the sides, the mouth couldn't eat anything, and the lungs and the heart struggled to keep going... Finally all of them pleaded with the brain to relent and let the butt be boss over all the other parts. And so it happened. The moral of the story is: You don't have to have a brain to be boss, just a *******!
__________________ Respect Our Outdoor Recreational Resources Leave No Trace Of Your Passing "Just Your Footprints in the Sand" 2003 5.3 Chevy P/U 1972 35' Crest Pontoon Houseboat Powered With 2007 90 hp. 4 Stroke Yamaha |
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#3124
11-21-2009, 06:50 AM
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| How about a few lesbian shorties.... What do you call a cupboard full of lesbians? A licker cabinet. What do you call an Eskimo Lesbian? A Klondyke What do you call 100 lesbians with guns? A Militia Ethridge Why can't lesbians diet and wear make-up at the same time? Because they can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on their face. What is a lesbian dinosaur called? A Lickalotapuss What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Fur Traders What do you call a lesbian with long fingers? Well hung. Did you hear that Ellen DeGeneres died? She was found face down in Ricki Lake. What do you call lesbian twins? Lick-a-likes. What's the definition of confusion? Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market. What's the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian? One's a snack cracker and the other's a crack snacker.
__________________ Respect Our Outdoor Recreational Resources Leave No Trace Of Your Passing "Just Your Footprints in the Sand" 2003 5.3 Chevy P/U 1972 35' Crest Pontoon Houseboat Powered With 2007 90 hp. 4 Stroke Yamaha |
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#3126
11-21-2009, 10:09 AM
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| Aparently the toilet seat was invented by the French in the 17th century. Then in the 18th century the English made one with a hole in it...
__________________ Regards Fanie Water ! Just gimme water ! |
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#3127
11-21-2009, 03:17 PM
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| http://www.abc.net.au/rn/lifeandtimes/ "Terry Lane interviews John Clarke - Writer, actor and satirist , John Clarke first made his mark in Australia on ABC Radio as Fred Dagg. He is by birth a New Zealander, and by adoption and absorption an Australian. " - - 24.9MB MP3 audio file can be downloaded
__________________ Try to be helpful... Remember that there are at least two sides for every story... |
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#3128
11-22-2009, 03:25 AM
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| URGENT CALL! Whoever forgot his wife at my place after last night's party is asked to come and get her ASAP. It is not that she embarasses me, but mine is coming back tonight.
__________________ Regards Fanie Water ! Just gimme water ! |
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#3129
11-22-2009, 06:22 PM
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| All obvious comments aside...... a) bet she had a great party before she crashed b) she's gonna spend the next 2 weeks cr@pping herself everytime the phone rings. Thank god she aint my wife, sister, daughter...... |
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#3130
11-22-2009, 06:32 PM
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| Quote:
 Hey. you started on the wild parties 
__________________ Regards Fanie Water ! Just gimme water ! |
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#3131
11-23-2009, 08:21 AM
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| Fanie, Looks as if you do know how to throw one hell of a party. Where I boat at on a river we also have some wild and good times that often involve beads and cleavage. Have had some memorial times there in the past and hopefully many more in the future. How about some Political satire from Saturday Night Live for your enjoyment. http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-li...-open/1178451/
__________________ Respect Our Outdoor Recreational Resources Leave No Trace Of Your Passing "Just Your Footprints in the Sand" 2003 5.3 Chevy P/U 1972 35' Crest Pontoon Houseboat Powered With 2007 90 hp. 4 Stroke Yamaha |
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#3132
11-23-2009, 08:51 AM
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| Ooooh... !!! boat parties is a big no no. If someone's wife gets left behind like that then you're stuck with her  and some never stop yacking so NO !!!
__________________ Regards Fanie Water ! Just gimme water ! |
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#3134
11-23-2009, 05:59 PM
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| dskira, Long ago, when it was announced, the rest of the world "laughed" and was amazedly asking, "FOR WHAT? nothing has been done by him  " Which is the truth - If that cannot be accepted, you need to consider better glasses and a hearing check-up... Honour and praise is usually something earned but then again that does not apply to many recent "Nobel prizes"...I see no evidence relating to a 'racist penis', '****', or a need to feel 'ashamed', nor an 'insult', nor 'cowardly behaviour', - - but indications of ill-informed, bigoted, indefensible bias, on your part in response... masrapido, has seen the world, is likely far better educated than you will ever achieve, is 'in retirement', an effective and profitable farmer and true capitalist (not a sorry excuse of a Keynesian manipulator as most in USA are governed under...) living in a democratic and free country (Which does not now describe USA by any stretch of the imagination)... Have a bit of a think about your own position before blowing off piteous steam and being shown to be wrong... Might I suggest that you could do worse than read JUST THE CONTENT of THE LINKS in the last 10 pages here http://www.boatdesign.net/forums/ope...26558-145.html - most of the links are from USA sources and generally TELL IT AS IT ACTUALLY IS... as opposed to the lies and motherhood statements from the likes of "mainstream media"...
__________________ Try to be helpful... Remember that there are at least two sides for every story... |
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#3135
11-23-2009, 06:04 PM
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| For you foreigners this is from another embarrassment of the US. All perverted things seem to gain acceptance first here in California. California Love Story  A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend. After having great sex ... She spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles .... Something she just loved to do. As he was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, "Why do you love doing that?" Because ... She Replied ... "I Really Miss Mine"
__________________ Respect Our Outdoor Recreational Resources Leave No Trace Of Your Passing "Just Your Footprints in the Sand" 2003 5.3 Chevy P/U 1972 35' Crest Pontoon Houseboat Powered With 2007 90 hp. 4 Stroke Yamaha |
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